Dead is dead…but does it smell??
Soooooo……
I promised you an update on my nutcase upstairs neighbors (or neighbor as the case now may be!!)
When last we left our little “Nightmare on CinnKitty’s Street” story….. I had come to the conclusion that the ancient crack whore had actually managed to *kill* her lover/son and was currently in the process of A.) Dragging his body around the apartment and B.) scouring the apartment for her crack stash that her lover/son had hidden from her.
All this derived from the monstrous fight that went on for 2 hours.
The extremely loud and extremely heavy “THUD” that precluded the sudden and absolute silence above me.
And….. the resultant slamming and bamming of every possible piece of furniture in the place.
I thought… I hoped…that she would find her hidden stash soon!
She was driving me nuts with all the slamming and bamming.
But hey… at least she wasn’t stomping and tromping.
After all… she probably weighed less than the half-dead crack dog, soaking wet, you know?
Of course, the logistics of this little, ancient crack whore dragging the body of her 500lb combat boot wearing, elephant stomping, naked as a jaybird son/lover around the apartment never really crossed my mind.
Until now……
Nope……. I think I have to amend my theory.
Oh…don’t get me wrong.
I still think she killed him.
But now….
Now…..
Now there was NO STOP to the activity going on above my head.
I kid you not.
I worked all weekend and I kept some pretty weird hours so at any given moment, there was ALWAYS someone walking overhead, or slamming a cabinet door, or turning on a radio or taking a shower, or…well.. you get my point.
For 48 hours STRAIGHT!!!!
Seriously……..as my favorite character, Mr. Grinch, would say:
On and on it went for the entire weekend.
2am ?? Noise
4am?? Noise!
10am?? Noise!!
3:36pm?? Noise! Noise! Noise!
And then……..at last, come Monday morning…..silence once more.
All day….nothing from upstairs but silence….. the deathly kind of quiet that only an empty apartment can hold.
And it dawned on me…
She must have had her crack-whore friends come over to: A.) help her dispose of the body (because no matter how much Pink Pelican wants to think it… that damn half-dead crack dog couldn’t possibly have any teeth left to gnaw on the bloated corpse) and B.) help her find her hidden stash.
I figure they got rid of the body over the weekend, found the stash and then laid around all day Monday… high as a kite or passed out.
Hence..the lack of noise.
Because come 8 or 9 pm’ish, last night.
There were once again signs of life (or would that be “sign” of life? if it’s only one person now?) in the apartment above me.
So there you have it.
My crack-whore conspiracy theory for the nutcases (or nutcase as the case may be now) that live above me.
Filed under: Apartment Complex Drama
It’s a good thing you’ve documented all of this. Instead of testifying at her trial, you can just print this out.
****Trial?? Trial?? Who said anything about *ME* testifying at any trial? Uh-huh! No way! Those crack whores are vengeful and mean. She’d come kill me AND my cat!
I know you haven’t had much luck with the property management company, but I’m thinking at this point, hourly complaints by phone and email to the office and copied up the chain of command might be worth while. Maybe you can get them evicted.
**Here’s my concern PP, if they move out.,.. WHO is gonna move in. Seriously… I’m afraid it will be someone WORSE!! And the sad part is, I’m not living in the slums. Seriously.. I’m not. But it sure feels like it. I’d say.. on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the Penthouse suite at Biltmore Estates) my apartment complex is “supposed” to be around 4-6 as far as safe neighborhood, expense, cost, etc… goes…. If I go any lower than that, I’ll have to start carrying a gun with me. If I go any higher than that… I’ll have to start selling my body to afford the rent. Yeesh!
If only Veronica Mars were a real person! You could totally hire her to find out what really happened.
I support your theory about the death. Most likely, they’re dismembering him. Soon they’ll be dragging out a series of garbage bags. Just wait. . .
***Wanna know what ever creepier? You NEVER see anyone come or go from that apartment. EVER! Yeah, I see the crack whore in the complex but I’ve never actually witnessed ANYONE coming or going from the front door. Weird!!!
Oh dear lord….As the Crack World Turns.
Could be Zombies….maybe she was eating the brains of her son/lover?
***Yep..l have a Soap Opera life. It’s a fitting title, that’s for sure!
Could be worse… could be Zombies on a Plane. Apparently, Pink Pelican says that’s worth a look or two. ha..ha…
Meth, I’m telling you! It will make you crazy and keep you going for hours, DAYS as the case may be, and then you come down, HARD.
Keep your doors locked, Cinn!
** I keep them locked AND I keep the alarm set at all times. Not that that matters. Hell… I’ve set off my own alarm at last 3 times and I’ve set off the smoke alarm at least 3 times (stupid cast iron skillet in the over…. Swoof.. when are you gonna make me some cornbread? ha.ha..) and NO ONE has ever shown up to see what was wrong. Yeah… I feel so “safe” in my “gated community”. Ha! The gates (both front and back entrances) haven’t been closed in at least 4 months!